Monday, December 28, 2009

Music to my side-head orifices


Now that I have your attention I can begin my cry for help. I am in a small room by now It's 4:55 PM and I have a small lunchbox containing 2 sandwiches, 1 juice box and a jar. A jar of fireflies. The walls in the room are white and my laptop is plugged into a single power point that has no on/off switch. There is a light above me with no cover...just a globe...My internet can access no other site but Blogger and, I have it tabbed. WMP has the song "Fireflies-Owl City" Playing on loop and I can't click anything outside my Firefox browser. So...I guess I'll write something.

5:00 PM-
Fuck, man...I've been trying to figure out how I got in this room. There are no doors, windows or anything! It's almost as if someone has put a large box on top of me! But the floor connects to the walls like they would in a normal house...Speaking of floors...laying here on my chest is very uncomfortable.

5:27 PM-
This song is great! The one upside to this predicament is that the song isn't shit. Still no fucking clue how I got in here...But that's the least of my problems. I need to find a way out.

5:33 PM-
I resortd to clawing at the fingers are killing me and the wall has only a slight scratch on it. This song is very soothing. It's helping me think. I would link you to it but I can't get to youtube, sorry. Yeah, so I'm going to try and find a hidden door. I'll try to refrain from ripping my fingers off lol.

5:40 PM-
That lunchbox looks tempting. But I am not THAT hungry and I have no idea how long I'll be in here. I'd better save it...Staring at my jar full of fireflies is really calming. If I didn't have this music or the jar I would be freaking out right now.

6:43 PM-
Shit, I have been neglecting this thing! Sorry guys. Anyway I am in serious need of some food. And this song is starting to get repetitive...I can't eat the food just yet, not only do I need to save it, I have no idea what they could of put in the food! For all I know it could kill me!

6:50 PM-
Fuck it. I'm taking a bite of this sandwich.

7:10 PM-
I'm starting to feel sick i shouldn't of eaten that fucking sandwich. My througt is dry and I feel like throwing up! The light is about to go out aye it's all flickering.

7:30 pM-
Yeah, the light is flickering like crazy this song is so fucking anoying I am so close to just smashing this thing against the floor!!!!

7:56 PM=
I threw my laptop at the wall and now it's bleeding. i ripped off some of my shirt to save it!!!!! I think hell be ok for now so PHEW hhahaha! FUCK THIS SONG! GAH why do i even liked that shit?

I smashed my fireflies jar and they are everywhere jeseus! There is weird smoke coming out of my laptops powr point! my tummy hurts so much CUNTTTTT CUNTTTTTTTTTT CCUNNNTTT HELPO ME!


10; 45-All my food is gone now. All the fireflies are dead I killed them all..... Fuck I loved them all so muh.............

ican Hardly see helome cuntscuntscints need a pie inside me INSIE EM ME

SO many Fuckckin vuttons to push diwebf whewh efihekad 'sd\d fe my face is bleedign I need Help pleas help me plese let me out of here.

HELP ME. HELP ME< PleasedajJ HElloPP Mefeeee Hellsoo Meeef j snnn NNHellpoo
Its 6: 006 PM I maGAbed so surVieve unTil Now much I amfoodlessAnd RUnnging Out of lightt the fLoror is coverddDD in fbldodd and I need Helop Pleae My fingers are Bleeidnbg and nmy osdew issbleeding andmy heart is slwouigmng diobwn and uia Cant msake is tiIl TOONEMMWOaOE HELO ME POKLADEPLAESE OWNHEL[


Fucck it I'm clikcing EBETRTWHERE

Sunday, December 27, 2009

The Jackson 5

Hey, all!

Here are some totally awesome, un-awesome and out right emosewa out-of-context quotes by me!

"Maybe Lawyer Lawyer will SHAVE us"

"Everyone is cyborg?"

"We have to kill every other person. Ever."


"I can't even put a G in brackets"

"I have video footage of my baby cousin Alex kicking the shit out of my dads balls"

"Then I drop the knife and we are all AARRROOOPPPSSS and it's tottaly funny"

"I love fun facts"




"But because it's vanilla. My favorite ice cream AND skin colour"

"Let's dye our hair black"

"Tell all those wordpress users to GET FUCKED"

"Christians use Serendipity"


"ASS! Hahahha"


"No robobots gunna be up in our grills"

"With fuckd up letters"

"Automatic Referral and Trackback blacklist update"

"Cartoon porn"


"Mandorm sounds kinda gay by itself"


That is all.

-Marrow "Rude dude" Randy(she)moose

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Hard evidence

Anwar says:
" According to Todd Howard, Elder Scrolls programmer, the game's sequel, The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind is 0.01% the size of Daggerfall"
what have YOU been up to
Chad says:
Anwar says:
Fo' crack?
Chad says:
What else am I gunna feed them babies with?
Anwar says:
True dat, True dat
Chad says:
I hate it when you watch movies liek Halloween
And then you keep contemplating killing people
And then you think your going crazy
But then you realised it's because your scared of the movie
But then you go through with it
And you can't hide the body
So you just keep it under your desk
And then you get your foot stuck in it all the time
Anwar says:
I hate that
Chad says:
I hate getting my foot stuck in dead people
Anwar says:
That sounds almost as bad as when sometimes you're just near a baby
and they're crawling on the floor, and you get an uncontrollable urge to stomp their head
and then you do
and brains go everywhere
and your mother is all
"Clean that up"
and then you just brush it under your bed
and then you get lots of flies in summer all the time.
I hate that
Chad says:
Yeah that almost happend to me today
Exept the baby was in a pram
And I was holding a plush with some plastic on it
I almost beat that little cunt with it
Beat it to death with a plush toy
And then eat it
I hate that feeling
Anwar says:
Yeah because then afterwards you're too full to eat dinner
Chad as says:

There. Now you know.

-Chad "Broski" Cunter

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Another song about scat.

Feces (In your hair)-The Crapberries

Shit on your head is smelly
Bile is slowly stinking
And the smell just causes silence
Who are we mistaken?
But you see, my feces
of my family
In your hair, in your hair
It's disgusting!
Shaped like tanks, chocolate bombs
Chocolate bombs, in your gums
In your hair, In your hair
Brown tears cryin!

In your hair! In your hair!
Feces! feces! feces,aye,aye,aye!
What’s In your hair, In your hair?
Feces! feces! feces aye,aye,aye,oh poo, poo, poo,poo poo...

Another mother’s breaking
Fart is taken over.
When the smell just causes silence
Our feces are stinking.
It’s the same old scene
Since scat at 16
In your hair, In your hair
Still disgusting!
Shaped like tanks, chocolate bombs
Chocolate bombs, in your gums
In your hair, in your hair
Flies are dyin’!

In your hair, in your hair
Feces! feces! feces,aye,aye,aye!
What’s in your hair, in your hair?
Feces! feces! feces aye,aye,aye, hey,oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, hey, oh, ya, ya-a!

-Randy "Crapberries" Marrowson

And if that wasn't enough shit for you...
Tarzan boy!!!

I wish it was still cool to dance like that...